


But If Your Love's My Remedy

by NiamJenn1994



Category: Larry Stylinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Murder, Smut, Suicide, Top!Harry, Younger Gemma, bottom!Louis, ghost!harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-13
Updated: 2013-11-13
Packaged: 2018-01-01 10:16:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1043631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NiamJenn1994/pseuds/NiamJenn1994
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I wish I could touch you..." Louis frowned looking at Harry's hand.</p><p>"Me too..." Harry smiled sadly looking at Louis straight in the eyes.</p><p>They stayed like that for a few seconds just looking at each other wanting, wishing they could kiss but knowing that wasn't possible. All Harry wanted was to touch Louis' lips with his own but he couldn't, they had only known each other for a few days and the want and need to have each other was already there. The need to touch burned through their souls setting them alight that only a single touch would be able to put it off but that would never happen and it hurt, it hurt Louis knowing that he was slowly falling in love with a boy he could never have.</p><p> Or the one where Harry and Louis are soulmates, even though Harry's dead and a ghost. (Happy Ending)</p>
            </blockquote>





	But If Your Love's My Remedy

**Author's Note:**

> Don't worry about character death, has a happy ending.
> 
> Thank you so much to Lynxh from bottom Louis library for helping me through out this fic, thank you for the summary and all your brilliant ideas.
> 
> That's why this is for you Lynxh!! Love you lots!! :)
> 
> Enjoy! :)

°°Cheshire, England. °°

December 23, 1995. 11:47 p.m.

 

"Harry I want mummy." A small seven year old girl whispered looking over Harry's shoulder towards the couch where their father sat inhaling something from the table she had no idea what it was.

 

"I know Gemma...mum will be here in a few hours from work, just be patient 'kay." Harry glanced back over his shoulder to the man he hated with all his being.

 

"Harry he's coming." Gemma whimpered trying to hide in his older brother's arms.

 

"Get up you piece of shit!" He screamed kicking Harry lightly on his lower back.

 

Harry slowly got up from the floor with his seven year old sister in his arms trying to hide her face on his chest where he knew she felt safe. He looked at what he was forced to call his father trying to maintain his expression neutral knowing that the wrong look could set him up and he needed to avoid that at all costs now that it was only him and Gemma. Times like this when his father Daniel would drug himself as much as he could usually were when his mother Anne was around and she could stay with Gemma keeping her quiet while Harry tried to control his violent father.

 

"I'm up." Harry mumbled looking down at the ground.

 

"I need money." Daniel slurred holding onto the wall for support.

 

"I don't have any." Harry said and it was true, whatever he had earned that week working at the bakery he had given it all to his mum to help her with the bills since his father used all the money he earned on drugs and alcohol.

 

"Don't you lie to me you son of a bitch, I know you do!" Daniel yelled lunging at Harry and falling down when Harry took a step back trying to quiet Gemma down.

 

"Shh princess, please don't cry." Harry whispered looking at his father with wide eyes.

 

"Give her to me!" Daniel shouted once he was back on his feet.

 

"What? No, get away from her." Harry said continuing to step back until he hit the wall, Gemma crying and gripping fistfulls of Harry's white V-neck shirt.

 

"Give. Me. The. Damn. Bitch!" Daniel growled grabbing Gemma's leg pulling harshly on it while she cried louder.

 

"No!" Harry yelled moving to get her out of his reach.

 

"You stupid child, I need money and you won't give it to me! I have a friend who will give me enough for her." Daniel said and Harry almost choked on his own saliva not believing what he was hearing.

 

"I'm not a child, I'm already eighteen and you can't tell me what to do." Harry said towering over his father using the height advantage.

 

He was tired of his father ways, and the way he treated them especially his mum who always got hurt making sure he didn't touch a hair on Gemma's head and his. Harry always tried to help her even if it meant receiving harsh beatings and after every single blow he wished he could take them away from him to keep Gemma from growing up they way he had but the little money they made was enough for food and the bills and they had nowhere to go.

 

"Oh really? Give her to me or I'll blow her head off, and I'm not bluffing kid." Daniel said pointing the gun at the back of Gemma's head as she started shaking violently.

 

"Dad...please just-just put it down." Harry pleaded resisting the urge to cry, he had his little sister to protect.

 

"Not until you give her to me." Daniel insisted.

 

"I'll give you the money, j-just wait a week so I can get it. Please put it down..." Harry continued pleading tightening his grip on Gemma who kept pulling his curls at the nape of his neck, something she did when she was extremely afraid.

 

"I want it now! Hmm, now that I think about it...I think he prefers blokes. Wouldn't you like that son? Since you...You like it up the ass." Daniel said laughing hysterically.

 

Harry looked at his father with a disgusted look before composing his face again staring at the gun in his father's hand. He slowly began to walk away and as soon as he saw fit he took off running towards his room through the kitchen stairs trying to ignore his father's threats and nasty words directed at them, he thought about escaping through the main stairs close to the front door but it was cold outside and Gemma only had pajamas on and he a white shirt with black jeans and worn out shoes.

 

"You fucking faggot, get your damn ass back here and give me that stupid cunt!" Daniel shouted going after Harry.

 

"Harry!" Gemma sobbed in his arms as he looked around his room desperate for a way out cursing himself for not heading straight to the front door.

 

"Shhh, we're gonna hide in the closet and play hide-n-seek but a new version of the game I came up with. Okay?" Harry said opening the closet door thanking the Lord it was Louvered that way he could see him through the cracks.

 

"What version?" Gemma hicupped crawling into the closet.

 

"You'll see my little Gemma." Harry whispered looking back over his shoulder.

 

He was about to hide when he heard his father outside his door and quickly gestured Gemma to be quiet no matter what and she only nodded knowing what to do like the many times before she had had to stay quiet no matter what she heard or saw. Harry shut the door as fast as he could and hurried up to get under his bed that was placed a few feet away in front of the closet door, he saw his dad slam the door open to his right and quickly turned his head over to his left looking at the window wishing he could grab Gemma and escape but his dad had nailed the window shut so it was impossible to open it with out a hammer and that was something he didn't had.

 

He was praying his dad would just get bored and leave without checking the closet or under the bed when he was suddenly pulled out from under the bed by his ankles and he knew he was screwed. Once he was out he ran to the closet to try and grab Gemma to make a run for it but his father tackled him down then dragged him back as he desperately tried to hold on to something to stop himself from getting dragged. He let out a choked scream when he dug his fingernails on the dark brown hardwood floor leaving scratch marks behind in attempts to get away from his tormentor.

 

"On your fucking knees." Daniel growled aiming the gun at the back of Harry's head.

 

"Dad please..." Harry begged hearing Gemma's whimpers coming from the closet.

 

"Get on your fucking knees facing the closet or I swear I'm gonna blow her head off." Daniel threatened and smirked when Harry got up on his knees halfway across his bed and the closet facing it.

 

"Dad..." Harry pleaded crying as he watched Gemma's fingertips through one of the cracks.

 

"Don't call me dad you fucking faggot! I want to know...What the fuck did I do to deserve a fag for a son and a retarded good for nothing and stupid bitch for a daughter?" Daniel hissed touching the back of Harry's head with the gun barrel.

 

"Don't you dare call her that! She's better than you, you're nothing but a waste of space." Harry said through gritted teeth finally letting all the anger out.

 

"Shut the fuck up or I'll shoot you!" Daniel screamed pulling the safety off.

 

"Do it! Go ahead and do it but please not here, not in front of her." Harry pleaded already knowing that he knew she was hiding there and was watching everything.

 

"Oh Harry, what's the point of killing you if she doesn't see how I blow your head off then?" Daniel laughed.

 

Harry's vision became cloudy with tears knowing it was the end for him and he couldn't do anything about it, he closed his eyes shut just praying for Daniel to leave Gemma alone after. He opened his emerald green eyes again and looked over at the closet door smiling sweetly then mouthing the words 'I love you Princess.' knowing Gemma was watching him.

 

December 24, 1995. 12:01 a.m.

 

Gemma didn't wanted to play Harry's new version of hide-n-seek anymore, all she wanted to do was crawl on his lap and watch a movie with him while they waited for their mum to get back. She watched how his dad had what Harry had once called a gun on the back of his head and knew he was gonna get hurt because she believed her big brother when he had explained to her that guns could hurt people and that she should never touch one, he made her promise him so and she did just like he promised her.

 

She began sobbing silently when Harry looked at her smiling the way he did when he looked at her or when she got good marks in her school projects and mouthed 'I love you princess.' like he always did from across the table at dinner time and when he dropped her off at school. She started breathing hard feeling like the air had been cut off of her when she heard a loud bang and her brother dropped down on the ground not moving while her father stared down at him wide eyed then ran out of the room while she crawled deeper into the closet hiding in Harry's clothes. Minutes later she crawled out of the closet after she was sure he was gone and sat down next to her brother looking down at him.

 

"Harry?" Gemma whispered shaking her brother's shoulder.

 

"Harry wake up...You're not suppossed to go to sleep until mummy gets here and you have to sing to me or I won't fall asleep. Harry wake up." Gemma begged then gasped when she noticed blood coming out of his head.

 

"He gave you a booboo Harry, is that why you want to sleep? It's okay, I'll tell mummy you're sick and that I took care of you like big girls do. I'll sing to you." Gemma said getting up to grab a blanket off of Harry's bed and covered him plopping down next to him.

 

"Sleep my child and peace attend thee,  
All through the night  
Guardian angels God will send thee,  
All through the night.

Soft the drowsy hours are creeping,  
Hill and dale in slumber sleeping  
I my loved ones' watch am keeping,  
All through the night.

Angels watching, e'er around thee,  
All through the night  
Midnight slumber close surround thee,  
All through the night.

Soft the drowsy hours are creeping,  
Hill and dale in slumber sleeping  
I my loved ones' watch am keeping,  
All through the night.

While the moon her watch is keeping  
All through the night  
While the weary world is sleeping  
All through the night.

O'er thy spirit gently stealing  
Visions of delight revealing  
Breathes a pure and holy feeling  
All through the night.

Angels watching ever round thee  
All through the night  
In thy slumbers close surround thee  
All through the night.

They will of all fears disarm thee,  
No forebodings should alarm thee,  
They will let no peril harm thee  
All through the night.

Though I roam a minstrel lonely  
All through the night  
My true harp shall praise sing only  
All through the night.

Love's young dream, alas, is over  
Yet my strains of love shall hover  
Near the presence of my lover  
All through the night.

Hark, a solemn bell is ringing  
Clear through the night  
Thou, my love, art heavenward winging  
Home through the night.

Earthly dust from off thee shaken  
Soul immortal shalt thou awaken  
With thy last dim journey taken  
Home through the night."

 

Gemma sung already missing the way it sounded when both of them would sing it together giggling every now and then when Harry would pull off funny faces at her then after they were done he will kiss her goodnight and tell her to have sweet dreams. She looked at him and smiled leaning down to kiss his cheek.

 

"Sweet dreams Harry."

 

°°Doncaster, England.°°

December 24, 1995. 12:01 a.m.

 

Loud sharp cries filled the room as a baby boy was welcomed into the world, his mother crying tears of happiness as he was placed on her chest where she wrapped her arms around him thanking god for giving him a healthy baby boy unaware that as her baby had taken his first breath a boy by the name of Harry had taken his last one and as she cried tears of happiness Harry's mother cried tears of despair and grief begging her son to wake up while Gemma, Harry's little sister clung to her insisting that he was just asleep as Harry watched them and his body with sad eyes from the corner of his room.

 

"Louis...Louis William Tomlinson. That's your name my precious baby." Jay whispered kissing his tiny forehead.

 

~*~

 

°°Cheshire, England.°°

December 8, 2013.

 

"Why can't we just move back to Doncaster instead of moving here...and in the same town?" Louis whined sitting in the front seat of his mum's car refusing to get out and enter his new acquired home.

 

"I like Cheshire and the other house was way too big for just the both of us, c'mon Boo I know you're gonna love it." Jay smiled getting out of the car.

 

Groaning and rolling his eyes Louis got out of the car and walked the small path that led to the front door and walked in looking around. The stairs were a few feet away from the front door right in front of him while on the right he could see the front room then the dinning room farther away, he walked further into the house and was greeted by a more comfortable living room. He walked to his left where it lead to the kitchen and farther away he could see the dinning room finding out he could access it through both the front room and the kitchen choosing to take a look at the back rooms on his left later. He noticed another set of stairs choosing to not go up through them feeling a little bit off and cold all of a sudden.

 

Shuddering he went back to the living room going to the back rooms where a half bathroom, the pantry, laundry room and an office were located. He decided to see what the second floor looked like going up through the front stairs two at a time, he was greeted by the master bedroom to his left that had its own bathroom and closet. To his right there was a full bathroom next to a small room that looked like it had belonged to a little girl, he walked further into the hallway noticing a bigger bedroom then the stairs leading down to the kitchen facing the door. He walked into the room taking in the beige carpet, Louvered closet doors and the walls painted a soft blue color.

 

"So you like it?" Jay asked startling Louis who jumped up a little putting a hand over his racing heart.

 

"I like this room...the other one is really girly." Louis said looking around.

 

"Well, this house was built in 1976 and since then only two families have ever lived here and both of them had daughters. If you want to you can use that room for whatever you want." Jay said.

 

"Okay...Why is this the only room with carpet?" Louis asked frowning at the beige carpet that he will have to vacuum to keep clean.

 

"Hmm, I have no idea sweetheart. Let's start bringing in our stuff so you can set up your bed." Jay smiled going downstairs through the kitchen stairs.

 

Louis walked down the stairs and outside towards the movers to tell them where he wanted his stuff then walked back towards his new room with a box, he jumped back a little bit startled when he saw a tall shadow run by from the kitchen stairs to his room. Taking a deep breath he slowly walked to his room finding it empty, he looked inside the closet also finding it empty then swallowed a tight like knot forming in his throat shaking his head thinking that all the pills he was taking were starting to affect him.

 

Once the movers had brought in his bed and the rest of his stuff he began setting it up dreading having to go to school the next day unaware of a pair of emerald green eyes watching him from inside the closet. Once his bed was set up in front of the closet and the rest of his furniture in the places he wanted them Louis began unpacking his clothes yanking the closet door open and organizing them by color just the way he liked it. By dinner time he was surprised that he had managed to unpack and set up his room all by himself knowing that probably by Tuesday it would be a mess.

 

"Are you done unpacking Boo?" Jay asked Louis when she saw him entering the kitchen through the dinning room.

 

"Yeah...do you want me to help you around here after dinner?" Louis asked eyeing the stairs.

 

"Sure Boo. Why didn't you come here through the stairs, much faster don't you think?" Jay asked smirking.

 

"I don't know but those stairs creep me out." Louis explained.

 

"It's okay Boo, you don't have to use them if you don't want to." Jay quickly said not wanting to upset him.

 

"Mum? I...umm, I was wondering...can I transfer schools? We moved houses, please mum." Louis pleaded.

 

"Baby...You know Cheshire High is the only school close and I don't have time to drive you all the way to that other school." Jay said feeling horrible for denying that to him after he had agreed with her about moving houses.

 

"I...that's okay mum, don't worry about it." Louis said with a forced smile.

 

"I'm sorry, I wish I could drive you but I can't be late for work or they'll fire me and we really need the money." Jay apologized hugging Louis.

 

"Don't worry, let's just eat okay?"

 

"Okay Boo."

 

That night Louis cried himself to sleep knowing that he would have to face them again the next day and no matter what he did he couldn't stop them from tormenting him just because he was gay. He missed his three friends Niall, Liam, and Zayn who were back in Doncaster and that he only saw during the holidays after Louis and his mum had moved to Cheshire when Louis was thirteenth following his father who only ended up leaving them three years later because according to Louis he wasn't good enough for his dad.

 

Harry carefully observed the new strange but beautiful boy who had cried himself to sleep feeling all the desperation he felt and feeding off of it like any other ghost would even if he didn't wanted it. He wanted to comfort him but he knew he couldn't even though he had seen him earlier as he ran up to his room through the stairs and that was something new since nobody had ever seen him before and he made no attempt of letting them know he was still there stuck in the house he had been murdered in by his own father.

 

For seventeen almost eighteen years Harry had been haunting his then house having no choice but to stay after his mother had left with Gemma to who knows where, he had cried when he couldn't follow them when they left a week after his death and sometimes he still does. He moved his hand to touch the wound in the back of his head then pulled it back to see dark red blood that somehow never never seem to stop pouring out even after almost eighteen years. He looked up startled when the boy moved and mumbled something making Harry disappear afraid that the boy might had seen him.

 

The next morning Louis woke up early to get ready for school and actually eat something, he walked out of his house towards the car with his mum walking after him and Harry looking down at him from Louis' bedroom window. As soon as they were gone Harry busied himself walking around the house looking at the extreme changes it had gone through ever since he was still alive one of them being the carpet over the wooden floor as he looked at his fingernails caked with blood from scratching it. He looked around trying, wanting to find a way and the will to just get out of the house and go after his mum and Gemma or just crossover to the other side, but he knew crossing over was impossible since he never saw the light.

 

****

 

"Oh look, it's Tomlinfag." A tall boy with short sandy brown hair and blue eyes shouted as Louis walked down the hallway with his head down trying to go unnoticed.

 

"Oi! Are you ignoring us fag!?" Another boy shouted.

 

"Spencer just leave me alone, you too Eric." Louis pleaded as he walked by them then tripping down on the floor when Spencer stuck his foot out sending him down to the ground.

 

"Whiny bitch." Eric hissed walking away with Spencer.

 

Louis slowly got up and picked up his books fighting the urge to cry as everyone watched, some with sympathetic looks and others mockingly. He slowly backed away until he was near the school entrance then took off running full speed towards his new house. Once he was inside he ran all the way to his room and slammed the door close then ran up to his bed throwing himself into it and began sobbing wanting to just die already. He slowly raised his head and eyed the small bag on top of his dresser then got up and took it taking out a small blade.

 

He took out a razor blade and he looked at it while crying wanting nothing but to just die already but he couldn't because then his mum would be all alone. He took off his shirt revealing scars on his forearms and stomach as Harry observed him with sad green eyes, Louis put the blade against his skin and Harry couldn't watch anymore. Louis was about to slice the skin on his left arm when the flashlight he kept by his bed went flying across his room hitting the closet door then landing on the carpeted floor with a loud thud. He quickly dropped the blade and turned around to see who had done it but found no one, he turned back around to pick up the blade but it had vanished into thin air and that's when Louis began freaking out.

 

"Hello?" Louis said loudly but no one answered.

 

He tried to forget about what had happened and left his room through the kitchen stairs even though they scared him, after he was in the kitchen he served himself a glass of water and quickly drank it all not even pausing to catch his breath. The next few hours he busied himself in helping his mum by unpacking the living room and her office finding it relaxing when he had to put everything in place. Soon his mum was home and quickly ate his dinner then took a shower and got ready for bed as the sleep quickly overtook him sending him into a peaceful slumber but just for a few hours.

 

To Louis it felt like he was trapped in a body that wasn't his own and the body he was in seemed to speak in its own as he or the person he was inside of clutched a small girl tightly in his arms and desperately tried to think of a way to get out of there as the man he now knew was the boy's father threw insults at him and threatened to kill the little girl. He ran all the way up to his room through the kitchen stairs not even stopping when he desperately needed a break from running with her weight in his arms.

 

"Harry!" The little girl whimpered holding onto him for dear life as Louis was surprised when he found himself willingly holding her tightly wanting to protect her even though his actions were still being controlled by the body he was in.

 

"Shhh, we're gonna hide in the closet and play hide-n-seek but a new version of the game I came up with. Okay?" The boy said in a deep desperate but soothing voice and Louis could feel, he could feel it in his bones how desperate this boy was.

 

"What version?" The little girl asked him as he pushed her inside his closet in his own room.

 

"You'll see my little Gemma." The boy Harry whispered quickly shutting the door and hiding under his bed.

 

Louis' body trembled as he slept and dreamt about the strange boy and girl, everything seemed to happen in a blur as he found himself inside his body being dragged as he scratched the wooden floor with his fingernails leaving them caked with blood then forced on his knees by the man he thought was supposed to protect Harry, not hurt him. He felt desperate as he pleaded to that sick bastard to not hurt Gemma, to shoot if he wanted to but to please leave her alone and not in front of her. He felt the tip of the gun in the back of his head and Louis wanted to cry but Harry wouldn't allow him to do so, he mouthed 'I love you, princess' and smiled before he heard a loud noise then everything went black.

 

"Harry?" Gemma whispered shaking Harry's shoulders as Louis watched the whole scene unfolding in from of him.

 

He turned his head to the side and saw him staring at Gemma and his body with wide sad teary eyes and he knew it was him. He seemed to be unaware that Louis was standing next to him, he glanced at the clock in the nightstand reading 12:01 a.m. then at the calendar where it clearly read December 24, 1995. His birthday. Harry had been killed that night while he had been born and just like that the tears began streaming down at a rapid pace before he could stop them. He watched as the little girl clearly not understanding what had just happened sung to him then whispered sweet dreams. He stayed there next to the boy's ghost until a tall woman with dark hair walked in and immediately began screaming, screaming for him to wake up while she covered Gemma's face with her chest as she kept saying Daniel had given him a booboo and that he was sick and sleeping. She didn't know any better.

 

Louis woke up drenched in sweat and breathing hard trying to get some oxygen into his lungs, he looked around and began to cry silently when he realized his room was the same room in his dreams. He abruptly stopped crying when he heard small muffled cries and saw the outline of a boy kneeling down in between his closet door and his bed as his shoulders shook violently. He rushed to turn on the soft light of his lamp but when he looked back the boy was gone, thinking that he was losing his mind he rubbed his hands on his face and when he looked back up he yelped and fell out of his bed as he stared at him.

 

Louis slowly got up as the boy stared at him with his emerald green eyes then he watched as he turned around walking towards the closet then disappearing as soon as he got to the door. Louis was left a mess when he saw the blood pouring out of the back of the boy's head drenching his white v-neck shirt with it, he abruptly remembered how Harry had scratched the floor by the closet door and wanting to know if what he had dreamt and seen was real and not just a product of his imagination he rushed towards the spot and began trying to pull the carpet off.

 

He growled when he couldn't lift it up and got up to look for a blade where he kept them in one of his drawers then stopped and stumbled backwards when instead of finding his blades he found a single white rose in their place, he knew it was one of the roses his mum had with her when she got home and she hadn't been in his room at all so she couldn't have put it there. He picked it up and set it down on his bed then frantically began searching for his blades but found nothing. Determined to look under the carpet he rushed to the kitchen coming back with a knife and scissors, he began cutting through the carpet until he had enough then pulled the piece of carpet off gasping at what he saw.

 

Eight almost fading light brown lines littered the floor and he slowly backed away shaking his head and closing his eyes tightly counting down from ten trying to convince himself that it was all just a dream. He opened them again and that's when he realized a boy had been murdered in his room right in front of him seventeen almost eighteen years ago the same day and time he had been born. Putting the piece of carpet back in its place and hiding the knife and scissors he looked around his room with frightened eyes then went back to bed forgetting about his bullies and focusing on what he had discovered. He fell asleep at four in the morning thinking about the dead boy whose name was Harry.

 

The next morning he was woken up by his mother banging on the door and he cursed himself remembering he had left the door locked and his mother Jay hated locked doors in her house. Mustering all the strength he had Louis got out of bed to try and unlock the door when he saw the white rose fall to the floor, he picked it up with shaky hands and put it back inside his drawer where his blades were supposed to be. He looked at it then the carpet and finally the closet door before looking back at the white rose then shut his drawer as his mum kept banging on the locked door.

 

"Mum I-"

 

"Oh my god, are you okay? Tell me you're okay baby." Jay said checking Louis all over.

 

"I'm okay mum, I just forgot to unlock my door last night." Louis smiled.

 

"Why did you locked your door boo, you know I don't like it." Jay scolded.

 

"Sorry, I was...I was..." Louis tried to explain as he struggled to come up with something believable other than what had happened last night.

 

"You were what, what were you doi-oh." Jay said as a look of realization crossed her face.

 

"I was-wait what?" Louis shrieked.

 

"It's okay boo you don't have to lock your door for your...your happy time, I knock first, I always do." Jay said blushing as Louis looked anywhere but her.

 

"Okay then...I need to get ready for school then." Louis said taking a step back, he thought it was better his mum thought he had been masturbating instead of looking for evidence that a boy had been killed there.

 

"Hurry up so you can eat breakfast." Jay smiled walking away.

 

Louis sighed in relief as soon as she was gone then moved to the bathroom in the hallway to take a shower and get ready for hell. He knew it was creepy but Harry couldn't help but observe the perfect blue eyed boy while he showered and couldn't help but also notice the scars that littered his wrists and like that he was gone. As soon as Louis got back to his room he jumped a few feet back and almost screamed when he saw the white rose on top of his bed and quickly opened his drawer to see that the rose he had left earlier was still there, he gulped and quickly got ready for school.

 

~*~

 

Louis ran into his house sobbing as he slammed door after door and running straight up to his room where once again he searched for his blades hoping that whoever took them had put them back in there again, he needed a release and he needed it now. Growling when he couldn't find them he ran to the kitchen looking for the sharpest knife they had, he grinned when he found it and as soon as he was about to slice his wrist to end it once and for all he heard loud footsteps coming from upstairs. Confused as to what was going on he put the knife down and made his way upstairs afraid as to who or what was up there since he was sure his mum was still at her work.

 

He walked with slow careful steps grabbing a pan on his way to the stairs and aim it in front of him getting ready to hit whatever it was. He checked every single room finding nothing and as he was just about ready to head back downstairs he heard them again but this time up in the attic, he lowered the ladder as he cursed himself for making the wrong decision of heading up there. As soon as he was in the dark stuffy attic he flipped the switch on and looked around but all he could see were empty boxes that his mum had decided to keep and knowing it was stupid to think that dead boy could have been the ones making noise he decided to just head back when a pile of shiny objects caught his attention. He walked over to them and crouched down gasping when he saw it was his blades but what the hell were they doing there.

 

"Someone like you shouldn't torture himself like that." Came a deep raspy voice from behind Louis and as soon as he turned around and saw him he let out the loudest scream he could muster up.

 

Standing in front of him was a tall boy with green eyes and dark brown curly hair holding a white rose in his right hand as he looked at Louis with amazement. He took a step closer then retreated again when Louis screamed louder, and with a small smile offered the rose to Louis hoping that would calm him down and show him that he wasn't out to hurt him. Louis observed him with frightened eyes taking in his delicate features, pale skin, and his white v-neck and black jeans, if he wasn't scared shitless of him at the moment then he would have assumed the boy was absolutely breathtaking.

 

"I'm not gonna hurt you. M'Harry." Harry smiled getting down on his knees shyly offering the rose to Louis once again.

 

"I-I-I know who you are. You-you made me dream that dream." Louis stuttered looking at Harry.

 

"I'm sorry about that, I can't control any of my actions since you got here." Harry apologized looking down at the floor smiling shyly.

 

"Did-did your father really murdered you?" Louis asked then groaned when Harry's smile disappeared and just like he had showed up he was gone again leaving the rose behind.

 

Louis sat up and left the attic taking the rose and his blades with him and hid them in his drawer with the other two roses, he was surprised his mum hadn't noticed yet that the roses kept disappearing and he hoped she never did. He looked around in his room then sighed sadly when he remembered why he had come home crying and then bursted out crying loudly again as he remembered what had happened with Spencer and Eric. He wished he could just die already so he could stop having to deal with them as they made his life a living hell.

 

"Please don't cry." A voice that Louis immediately recognized as Harry's said sadly.

 

"Why do you even care? You don't even know me." Louis mumbled from his spot on the bed.

 

"You're right I don't know you but I don't like watching you cry." Harry said walking closer until he was standing next to the bed.

 

"Why?" Louis asked lifting his head up to look at Harry.

 

"I've seen enough people cry and I don't like it, for some reason you're the only one who can see me and I don't like watching you suffer." Harry genuinely said it made Louis feel warm inside.

 

"H-how old were you when you know?" Louis asked.

 

"I was eighteen." Harry said playing with Louis' pencils that were on top of his desk.

 

"Why did you never left?" Louis asked once again.

 

"I couldn't, when my mum and my little sister left I tried to follow them but I couldn't. I can't leave this place and I don't think I ever will." Harry answered.

 

"I'm sorry." Louis said.

 

"Doesn't matter. My sister's twenty-four now and she probably forgot me already, can't say the same about my mum. What's your name?" Harry asked changing the subject.

 

"Louis. How come I can see you?" Louis asked.

 

"I thought your name was 'Boo' and I don't know." Harry smiled and Louis found himself getting lost in it.

 

"I-I wonder if I can touch you since you can-you can move things around." Louis gulped reaching to touch his hand before Harry could stop him only to face disappointment when his own hand went right through Harry's.

 

"You can't...and how old are you?" Harry asked trying to hide his disappointment.

 

"Seventeen, I'll be turning eighteen December 24. You?" Louis asked.

 

"I was going to turn nineteen in February 1st but I died." Harry said looking down.

 

"You died when I was born, I saw it in that dream a-"

 

"Your mum's here, I have to go now." Harry interrupted him getting up.

 

"Wait! You're coming back right?" Louis asked with hope etched in his voice.

 

"Y-you want me to come back, like keep talking to you?" Harry asked.

 

"Yeah...only if you want." Louis asked nervously.

 

"Of course." Harry smiled before disappearing.

 

That night dinner felt like an eternity as Louis patiently waited for it to be over so he could go back to his room with the excuse that he had lots of homework just so he could talk to Harry and get to know him better. Maybe it was the feeling of being all alone with no friends or he just really liked talking to Harry and being the only one who could see him but he just really wanted to be near Harry and he knew he should be scared of him since he was a ghost but the green eyed boy only made him feel peaceful and happy when he was anything but that. Bringing the leftover buffalo wings they had had for dinner up to his room with him to finish them off he closed the door after him and sat down cross legged on his bed with the plate in front of him.

 

"Harry?"

 

"Hi." Harry said appearing in front of Louis scaring him.

 

"Jesus, you scared the shit out of me." Louis said clutching his chest.

 

"Sorry." Harry apologized smiling at Louis and never losing eye contact with him.

 

They spent the rest of the afternoon talking and getting to know each other until it was bedtime and much to Louis' disapproval Harry had said he had to go because if he stayed then there was no way Louis would go to bed. Little did louis know that as soon as he had fallen into a deep sleep Harry had come back and stood guard all night watching him sleep and trying his best to protect the beautiful blue eyed boy in his sleep. The next day when Louis woke up he smiled when he saw Harry sitting on his desk chair reading what looked like a random book from Louis' collection.

 

"Morning." Louis smiled lazily up at Harry whose whole face brightened up as soon as he saw he was awake.

 

"Morning sunshine." Harry smiled showing that damn cute dimple that Louis was still trying to get used to but couldn't.

 

"Ugh, I don't wanna go to school." Louis whined closing his eyes again.

 

"Why?" Harry asked.

 

"Let's say that I-"

 

"You get bullied." Harry said angered at the thought of someone hurting Louis.

 

"It's no big deal." Louis said.

 

"It is. Get ready or you'll be late." Harry said then he was gone.

 

***

 

"Spencer please don't." Louis begged.

 

"Shut up you fag and take it like a man-oh wait, you aren't a man." Spencer hissed then punched Louis straight in the gut sending him down to the floor.

 

"We'll be seeing you tomorrow Tomlinfag." Eric laughed mockingly then walked away with Spencer.

 

Louis cried as he made his way home wincing in pain every time he took a step, as soon as he got home he was welcomed by Harry sitting on the stairwell waiting for him and Harry's eyes widened as soon as he saw the state he was in.

 

"What happened to you?" Harry asked, concern filling his voice and eyes.

 

"Some idiots in school who think that beating the crap out of me is funny." Louis said going upstairs followed by Harry.

 

"I'm sorry, I wish I could do something." Harry mumbled sitting down on the toilet seat.

 

"Don't worry about it, six more months and I'll be out of that hell hole." Louis said wincing in pain as he touched the bruises littering his stomach.

 

"Are you leaving Cheshire for uni?" Harry asked trying to hide his sad tone.

 

"I don't know. Have you ever tried going outside?" Louis asked.

 

"I told you I can't." Harry said sticking his hand through the closed cabinet.

 

"You tried once and that was almost eighteen years ago." Louis said crossing his arms over his chest.

 

"Yes and that was enough for me." Harry said.

 

"Okay then..." Louis mumbled walking out of the bathroom then heading downstairs with Harry following after him.

 

"Where are you going Lou?" Harry asked as Louis kept walking then his eyes widened when Louis unlocked the backdoor and walked out all the way towards the fence where he stopped and turned around to look at Harry.

 

"I'm not going back in there until you come out here." Louis yelled then sat down on the ground looking at Harry expectantly.

 

Harry looked at Louis then the threshold really wanting to go out there with Louis, he wanted to be with Louis all the time so taking a deep breath he crossed the doorway as the bright sunlight hit his face. He smiled and began running around laughing and just enjoying the outside world and Louis' company. Louis could only watch with the biggest smile on his face as Harry ran around like a small child laughing and watching all the flowers in awe.

 

"Now we don't have to be away from each other when I go to school." Louis said then quickly covered his mouth realizing what he had just said. He was starting to get way too attached to Harry and for the first time in his life it made him happy to want to be with someone.

 

"Yeah, I can be with you all the time. Except when you shower." Harry giggled sitting next to Louis.

 

"Yeah except when I shower." Louis blushed a deep shade of red not seeing the way Harry was looking at him like he was the most precious thing in the world.

 

***

 

"Take me backwards, turn me around.  
Cannot find my balance on the ground.  
This world's too heavy for a feather falling quickly.

And I wrote you a story,  
But I'm afraid of how it ends.  
And all my friends are doing well,  
and I'm still on the mend.

I'm going to lay back down,  
Hope the wind takes me around  
I gotta find some courage in this town.  
Cause nobody's going to save  
Somebody who won't change

I try to be brave.  
And nothing's coming easy,  
And all at once I feel a little queasy.  
Oh, but if your love's my remedy  
Oh, would you please come and be with me?

It's not like there's much better.  
Nobody's grass is as green as mine.  
I can't say that I'm satisfied,  
Three thousand miles from your kiss goodbye.

I'm going to lay back down,

Hope the wind takes me around.  
I gotta find some courage in this town.  
And everybody's afraid,  
'Cause chances come from change.  
And everybody's afraid,  
'Cause chances come from breaking.  
Chances are you're breaking open."

 

Harry smiled as he listened to Louis singing while he showered, he looked up at the calendar noticing it was already december twelfth and sighed knowing that in ten more days it will be the eighteen anniversary of his death. He wondered if his mother Anne and sister Gemma visited him wherever he was buried then laughed bitterly as he realized he didn't even know where he had been buried, he could have been cremated but he didn't remembered his mother coming back with his ashes.

 

"What are you laughing at?" Louis whispered since his mum was in her room and could easily hear him.

 

"Ten more days and I'll be officially eighteen years dead." Harry said smiling at Louis who was brushing his wet hair.

 

"Ten more days and I'll be officially eighteen years old." Louis said.

 

"What are you doing for your birthday?" Harry asked thinking that maybe they could spend it together but who was he kidding, Louis probably wanted to spend it with his friends.

 

"Well my three friends are coming over from Doncaster the twenty second to spend the day with me then mum and I will go out for dinner the twenty third...I was thinking that maybe you and I could spend the day before christmas together watching movies or something. Only if you want." Louis blushed looking at Harry with hope in his eyes.

 

"I would love too." Harry smiled, happy that Louis wanted to spend time with him. A ghost.

 

The thought had Harry's smile turn into a frown as the truth slowly sunk in, he was a ghost, he was a dead boy who should be thirty six years old if he would've still being alive but unfortunately for him he was dead.

 

"Hazza what's wrong?" Louis asked as he took a sit next to Harry.

 

"Hazza?" Harry raised an eyebrow.

 

"I decided that's your new nickname while I was showering." Louis said matter of fact.

 

"Louis Tomlinson you think about me while you shower?" Harry fake gasped holding back the giggles threatening to escape.

 

"I-I don't, I mean I-so what if I do?" Louis pouted crossing his arms over his chest.

 

"I was just teasing you, c'mon Lou smile for me. Smile ." Harry smiled reaching to touch him but stopping when he realized he couldn't.

 

"I wish I could touch you..." Louis frowned looking at Harry's hand.

 

"Me too..." Harry smiled sadly looking at Louis straight in the eyes.

 

They stayed like that for a few seconds just looking at each other wanting, wishing they could kiss but knowing that wasn't possible. All Harry wanted was to touch Louis' lips with his own but he couldn't, they had only known each other for a few days and the want and need to have each other was already there. The need to touch burned through their souls setting them alight that only a single touch would be able to put it off but that would never happen and it hurt, it hurt Louis knowing that he was slowly falling in love with a boy he could never have.

 

"Boo, you ready?" Jay shouted from her bedroom startling them breaking off their trance.

 

"Let's go Haz." Louis smiled walking out of his room with Harry following after.

 

Louis watched with a playful smile as Harry made himself comfortable in the backseat of her mum's car paying close attention to his mother's rambling. As soon as he was dropped off at the school entrance he took a deep breath hoping for Spencer and Eric to leave him alone because he didn't wanted Harry to witness the way those jerks treated him. Unfortunately such luck wasn't on his side and as soon as he stepped in the school hallway with Harry by his side he was slammed into a locker by the two smirking idiots. He was about to get punched when he noticed a red angry mark on his attacker's forearm, he looked up to see a fuming Harry staring at it with dark angry eyes as his breathing became ragged.

 

"What the hell?" Spencer hissed as the mark began stinging.

 

"You should pour some water over it mate." Eric suggested.

 

"We're not done with you Tomlinfag." Spencer growled pushing Louis away.

 

"Thank you." Louis whispered as soon as they were gone.

 

"I could have done more than that." Harry fumed still staring in the direction both boys had gone through.

 

"How did you do that?" Louis whispered.

 

"I don't know, I told you I can't control what I do since you got here, as the days go by I'm starting to do things I couldn't before." Harry shrugged it off looking around the building.

 

Surprisingly Spencer and Eric left Louis alone for the rest of the day and Louis and Harry's moods brightened at that. The days passed with them only pushing Louis against the lockers and Harry wanting to do worse things to them. Soon enough it was already the twenty second and Louis couldn't wait for Liam, Zayn and Niall to get there and spend the day with them, Harry was slightly upset that he couldn't spend the day with Louis like a normal person but said nothing about it. Louis sensing what was going through Harry's mind had assured him that he was always on his mind and that they would be spending the early hours of his birthday together.

 

"Loueh!" Niall screamed running towards Louis crushing him into a hug.

 

"Nialler, I missed you." Louis smiled hugging him back.

 

"Happy early eighteen birthday." Liam smiled widely reaching for Louis to hug him.

 

"Thank you Li." Louis smiled.

 

"Hey hey hey, how's my birthday boy?" Zayn said pushing Liam out of the way to hug Louis himself.

 

"Great!" Louis exclaimed looking up and seeing Harry sitting at the top of the stairs watching his friends carefully then at him with a rather possessive look before disappearing.

 

"We brought presents!" Niall cheered rather loudly making his way towards the christmas tree with bags in his hands.

 

"Leprachun never changes." Louis said fondly.

 

"Never." Liam agreed.

 

"Alright who's the lucky boy?" Zayn raised his eyebrows smiling at Louis.

 

"I don't know what you're talking about." Louis blushed completely giving it away.

 

"You're glowing Lou, c'mon tell us his name." Niall urged looking at Louis expectantly.

 

Louis contemplated telling them but Harry could be listening and he didn't wanted to make it awkward between them, he didn't wanted to lose Harry's friendship because if he did he wouldn't know what to do without him. He looked at his friends faces seeing the big bright smiles waiting for him to tell them the name of the boy that made him smile and blush like a schoolgirl. Fuck it, he decided knowing that he would have to tell them at some point, they were gonna get it out of him sooner or later anyways.

 

"Alright...his name is Harry." Louis blushed smiling down at his lap.

 

"You must really like him, just look at that smile and those bright eyes whenever you say his name." Liam smiled.

 

"Is he from your school?" Niall asked.

 

"-Yeah." Louis nervously said looking around.

 

"Why don't you call him and ask him to come over, we would love to meet him." Zayn suggested as Louis began panicking.

 

"He's-he's out of town with his mum plus I'm not even sure if he likes me back." Louis fiddled with his hands, the last part was true, he didn't even know if Harry liked him much less loved him back the way he did.

 

"I'm sure he does or he's an idiot if he doesn't like you." Zayn smiled putting a hand over his shoulder.

 

"We should get going guys." Louis got up from the couch walking over to the front door turning his head around just in time to see Harry looking at him with a tiny smile before Niall pushed him out the door.

 

After spending all day with his friends and missing Harry he finally made it back to his house after hugging his friends goodbye since they had to go back to Doncaster. As he crossed the front door he made his way to the kitchen were his mum was to let her know he was back and because he was scared of going back to his room where he knew Harry would be waiting for him, that's if he hadn't scared him away with his confession earlier on. Taking a deep breath he finally made his way back to his room and as soon as he opened the door he saw him sitting on his bed with his back to him looking out the window.

 

"Hazza?" Louis whispered, too scared to talk any louder.

 

"Lou, you're back." Harry smiled turning to look at Louis.

 

"Yeah...What did you do all day?" Louis asked plopping down next to him.

 

"Nothing. I wanted to go to the cemetery to try and find the place where I was buried but I'm too scared to go." Harry said.

 

"If you want we can go together." Louis offered.

 

"You would do that for me?" Harry asked.

 

"Of course." Louis nodded.

 

"Lou? What you said earlier...is-is that true?" Harry stuttered and if it was possible he would be blushing a million shades of red.

 

"Yeah...I'm sorry." Louis apologized covering his face with his hands out of embarrassment.

 

"Don't be sorry...I like you too, actually I like you a lot." Harry smiled looking at Louis with love filled eyes.

 

"Really?" Louis asked.

 

"Really." Harry confirmed.

 

Louis smiled widely wanting to hug Harry but settled with just looking at him, both boys never taking their eyes off of each other. They talked until Jay knocked on the door and told Louis he had to go to bed to rest since tomorrow was going to be a busy day for both of them. That night Harry stayed with Louis unable to sleep but he was content just by watching him sleep, that was the only time Louis looked relaxed and younger than he was and to Harry more beautiful than ever.

 

The next day Louis woke up close to noon since he was on break and busied himself with cleaning his room as Harry chatted about the new movies Louis had promised to show him on their movie night together. As soon as Louis had finished with his room at around three he quickly took a shower to get ready for dinner with his mum wanting it to be over soon so that he could spend the rest of the night with Harry. He had almost hugged Harry on his way out and had begged him to go with them but Harry quickly shut down the offer saying that he and his mum should have that time for themselves since he was gonna have him all to himself for the rest of the night and the early morning.

 

"You're quiet Boo, what's wrong?" Jay asked with worry in her eyes.

 

"Nothing's wrong mum, I was just thinking." Louis quickly answered.

 

"About that boy Harry?" Jay giggled wiggling her eyebrows as Louis blushed furiously.

 

"Mum!" Louis gasped.

 

"C'mon love, I can hear you talking to him and giggling on the phone every day, you should invite him over for dinner sometime. i would love to meet that special boy who makes my son smile so much." Jay smiled softly.

 

"Maybe..." Louis mumbled, his mum had heard him talking to Harry and now she wanted him to invite him to dinner. if only she knew he had absolutely no friends in school because everyone was homophobic jerks and that his friend Harry was a ghost, the boy he was in love with and who had been brutally murdered in his room eighteen years ago.

 

"Harry Styles is his name right?" Jay asked making Louis choke on his mashed potatoes.

 

"Y-Yeah why?" Louis nervously asked.

 

"Just wondering. You okay there?"

 

"Yeah."

 

The rest of dinner went smoothly with no more questions about Harry and Louis couldn't be more thankful. They got home later that night at around ten after Jay had insisted on taking a walk around town since they hadn't done that in a while now. As soon as they were home Jay hugged and wished Louis a very very happy eighteen birthday then went to bed saying she was knackered and that Louis could stay up as late as he wanted but that tomorrow she wanted him up before ten. As soon as she had closed the door to her room louis took another quick shower then hurried up to his room where Harry was already waiting for him.

 

December 23, 2013. 11:09 p.m.

 

"How was dinner?" Harry asked squirming a little at the uncomfortable feeling forming in the pit of his stomach.

 

"Good, are you okay Haz?" Louis asked grabbing the movie they had chosen to see and putting it on the DVD.

 

"Yeah...the time is near and I just feel funny like all those times before." Harry shrugged it off motioning for Louis to go lay next to him

 

"But you're okay?" Louis insisted.

 

"Yeah...stop worrying love." Harry smiled.

 

Louis couldn't stop the blush formimg on his cheeks when Harry called him love but luckily Harry was busy watching the movie and completely missed it. Louis didn't know when but he had fallen asleep then he was woken up by a small heavy weigh next to him, he opened his eyes to see Harry asleep and cuddling close to him. Confused he turned his head to look at the clock and his eyes widened when he saw the date and time.

 

°°December 24, 2013. 12:01 a.m.°°

 

He turned to look at Harry and gasped when he noticed Harry was asleep and he was touching him, he could feel him, feel how warm he really was and feel his weight almost on top of him. He gently shook him awake and almost cried when he noticed Harry's bright green eyes staring back at him. Louis brushed his cheek with his thumb and Harry bolted up at the touch looking at him with wide confused eyes.

 

"W-what's going on?" Harry asked looking around.

 

"I-I don't know but I can feel you Haz." Louis mumbled touching his arm.

 

"How?" Harry asked reaching to touch Louis' face.

 

Harry looked at Louis with wide eyes and a small smile getting surprised when Louis lunged forward connecting their lips together as he immeditaly began kissing him back in an eagerly yet sweet kiss, Louis slowly wrapped his arms around Harry's neck pulling him on top of him never breaking the kiss. They didn't know how much time they had left so they didn't wasted time as their hands roamed through out their bodies touching everywhere they could, soon clothes were shed and Louis found himself panting beneath Harry as they rubbed their erections together. Louis gasped when he realized his scars were out in Harry's plain view but Harry only smiled and kiss each and every one of them making Louis tear up but quickly blinked them away.

 

"Harry please..." Louis begged desperately wanting to feel Harry inside of him.

 

"Are you sure?" Harry asked.

 

"Yeah...I'm ready, I want you to be my first." Louis mumbled against Harry's lips.

 

"Wait...your first time?" Harry gasped pulling away from Louis and hovering over him.

 

"Yeah...its okay, I want to. I wanted to do it with someone special and you are very special to me" Louis nervoulsy said.

 

"You are special to me too, its just that I thought you had some kind of experience with this. When i was alive I never...you know. This would be my first time too and I don't wanna hurt you." Harry blushed a deep red.

 

"You won't, I trust you Harry." Louis kissed Harry again.

 

"Okay." Harry smiled.

 

Harry slowly leaned in and kissed Louis again moving in between his tighs rubbing small circles on both of them with his hands as Louis ran his fingertips at the lenght of Harry's smooth long and warm back feeling himself getting harder by the second. Louis pushed Harry on his back then straddled his hips kissing his jaw and all the way down his chest and stomach pausing a bit before taking him in his mouth. Louis was a virgin but he had seen enough porn videos and had learned the basics of what he was currently doing and according to the noises Harry was making he was doing a pretty great job.

 

"Oh God Lou..." Harry moaned trying to keep himself from bucking up deeper into Louis' mouth.

 

Louis hollowed his cheeks humming as he bobbed his head wrapping his hand around what he couldn't fit into his mouth then pulled back twisting his tongue around it licking at the slit. Harry felt like he was going to come at any minute at the overwhelming sensation of Louis' warm mouth and tongue around him. He slowly pulled Louis back turning them around so that he was on top of him and began kissing him again. Louis wrapped his legs around Harry's hips bringing him closer to him.

 

"You ready?" Harry asked sucking on his fingers as Louis watched with blown wide eyes.

 

Harry's eyes were no longer green but a dark color and his red lips were even redder and swollen from all the kissing that had taken place. Louis nodded as Harry slowly inserted one of his fingers inside him past his rim making him close his eyes at the intrusion.

 

"You okay?" Harry asked stopping what he was doing.

 

"Yeah, keep going. You can add another." Louis panted looking Harry with a tiny smile.

 

Harry slolwy added another finger and began stretching Louis open and scizzoring him, a few minutes later he added a third finger slowly working him open trying not to hurt him.

 

"I'm ready Haz.." Louis mumbled connecting their lips together.

 

Harry coated himself and slowly entered Louis stopping every time Louis' face would show te was in pain, once he was all the way in he waited still waiting for Louis to adjust feeling the warm tight heat around him. It was a feeling both boys had never felt before, Louis felt full but satisfied as Harry felt the overwhelming urge to just pound into Louis but he knew better and he wouldn't hurt Louis like that so instead he waited for him to give him the okay to start moving. Harry kissed Louis' face lovingly trying to distract him from the discomfort he knew Louis was feeling at the moment.

 

"Y-you can move. Move." Louis urged then moaned loudly when Harry pulled out leaving only the tip in then slowly pushed back inside.

 

"Shh love you have to be quiet." Harry whispered against Louis' ear making Louis shudder pleasantly at the warm feeling of Harry's breath.

 

Louis tried not to moan biting on Harry's shoulder to keep himself from screaming when Harry hit a particular spot making him clench around Harry wanting to feel it again as Harry went a little bit faster grunting almost quietly. Louis looked up to see Harry covered in sweat, his curls sticking to his forehead looking down at him. He reached up to kiss him feeling the warm breath on his own mouth. The feeling of Harry deep inside of him and his own member had Louis coming coating both Harry and himself as he clenched aroud him due to the pleasure coursing through his body while Harry followed soon after coming deep inside of Louis.

 

"I love you Lou." Harry mumbled against Louis' neck.

 

"I love you too Harry." Louis wrapped his arms around Harry's neck rubbing his shoulder with his thumb.

 

Harry looked at the clock noticing it was only twelve forty and slowly pulled out of him and got up telling Louis to wait there for him. He walked to the bathroom wetting a towel with warm water then with careful steps walked back to Louis' room and began cleaning him up as best as he could wiping the come off of his chest then between his tighs where he was leaking then cleaned his own chest before tossing the towel aside and climbing back in bed next to Louis wrapping his arms around his smaller frame kissing his forehead then his closed eyelids then finally kissing him gently on the lips.

 

"I love you." Louis mumbled sleepily against Harry's chest.

 

"I love you too, go to sleep love." Harry mumbled tightening his arms around Louis never wanting to let go.

 

"No...who knows till when we'll be able to be like this and I don't wanna miss anything." Louis mumbled looking up at Harry with a tiny smile. They stayed like that just holding each other sharing small and soft kisses and touches that sadly they knew they weren't going to last any longer but they tried to make the most of it.

 

December 24, 2013. 1:01 a.m.

 

They were still holding each other when Harry slowly began to fade away and Louis tried to hold on to him as much as he could silently crying as Harry kissed him one more time before he was back to the way he had been before. Louis looked up to see Harry standing by his bed wearing the same clothes but he was smiling and Louis couldn't help but smile too, they had been able to hold and touch each other for just an hour and it had been enough for the both of them to know that they will always love each other no matter what.

 

"Go to sleep love, I'll be here when you wake up." Harry whispered kneeling down next to Louis' bed guarding him for the night.

 

The next day Louis woke up slightly disoriented looking around his room when he suddenly remembered what had happened the night before and couldn't help but smile, it soon faded away when he noticed Harry wasn't anywhere in his room.

 

"Harry?" Louis move to get up wincing at the pain shooting from his bum to his lower spine.

 

"I'm right here love." Harry said standing in front of Louis.

 

"Where were you?" Louis asked.

 

"Just in the backyard thinking." Harry said taking a seat in front of Louis.

 

"About what?" Louis asked blushing and looking down since he was still naked.

 

"I was wondering-you don't have to if you don't want to but I was wondering if you could go with me to the cemetery. I wanna know where I was buried." Harry fiddled with his hands.

 

"Of course, just let me eat something and take a shower." Louis smiled getting up wincing in pain.

 

"You okay Lou?" Harry giggled.

 

"Shut up." Louis glared waddling out of his room.

 

After taking a shower, eating something and successfully avoiding his mum's questions as to why he was walking funny Louis had finally managed to borrow his mum's car and drove to the cemetery trying to calm Harry's nerves. As soon as they got there Harry slowly got out of the car and closely followed Louis who decided it would be easier to just ask if a Harry Styles had been buried there eighteen years ago instead of searching for it themselves. As soon as they had found out that indeed he had been buried there they went looking for it and once they got there they noticed two women standing in front of it.

 

"Do you know them?" Louis asked as they hid from their view.

 

"One of them is my mum and the other I don't know...wait, Gemma." Harry mumbled with tears in his eyes.

 

"What are you still doing here? Go talk to them, I'll be waiting here. I love you Haz." Louis smiled.

 

"I love you more." Harry smiled then slowly walked over to where his mother and sister were standing.

 

As he slowly approached them he couldn't help the tears that ran down his cheeks, it had been exactly eighteen years since the last time he saw them. He observed how much they had changed and let out a sob when he saw Gemma was no longer his little Gemma but a young beautiful woman expecting a child, his mother looked much older but she was still as beautiful as the last time he had seen her. He approached them and stood next to them as they silently cried, he looked over at the gravestone reading the cursive letters and numbers.

 

In Loving Memory Of

Harry Edward Styles

2/1/1977 - 12/24/1995

Loving son and brother.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane,  
I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

 

"I miss you baby and I love you so so much." Anne whispered as she set white roses on his gravestone.

 

"I miss you too mum and I will always always love you." Harry whispered touching her shoulder surprised that he had been able to do so.

 

"I'll leave you alone Gems, I'll wait in the car love." Anne kissed her cheek then walked away leaving her alone.

 

"Hi Harry...I never stayed behind because I never knew the right thing to say. What I just want to say is I love you and...and thank you for saving my life. I'm sorry that you had to die to protect me because that's not how it was supposed to be." Gemma said as the tears fell down her face.

 

"You were supposed to get old with me, you were supposed to walk me down the aisle but you didn't-you didn't and I'm sorry. For many years I have lived feeling like this, feeling guilty for what he did to you and I could have done something to stop him but I didn't...Harry I didn't know and now you're gone. Sometimes I can't sleep knowing that if I close my eyes it will happen all over again and I will have to watch all over again how he took your life away, how he-and I can't, I just can't. I can't deal with it, it hurts Harry...it just hurts so much.

 

You know...I'm gonna have a baby boy and you wanna know the name I chose for him? His name is Harry, Harry just like you. I miss you bub, not a day goes by where I don't think about you and I hope that wherever you are you're happy, you deserve the best. He's paying for what he did to you bub, mum says he's sorry for what he did to you but that's not gonna bring you back. I hope his pain never stops just like mine never will, I haven't seen him since then and honestly I could care less about what happens to him." Gemma wiped away her tears and Harry couldn't help but cry.

 

"It wasn't your fault and it never will be, what could you have done if you were only seven-you were and still are my little Gemma, my princess. How were you to know he was gonna do that? You are my beautiful baby sister and if I have to die a thousand times more to protect you then I'll do it because I love you and you're my sister, that's what I do Gems, I protect you." Harry said wishing Gemma could hear him.

 

He could feel the desperation rolling off of her and it hurt to know she felt guilty and that it was her fault that man he refused to call his father had done to them, especially to her who was just a little girl and had been forced to watch her older brother get murdered by the man who was supposed to protect them. With trembling hands he reached out for her placing a hand over her cheek and another one over her belly smiling when little Harry kicked against his hand.

 

"I miss you so much Harry...I love you bub." Gemma sobbed finally being able to just let it all out.

 

"I miss you too my little Gemma. To me you'll always be my little Gemma and I know that one day far away from now we'll meet again. I'll be waiting princess. I love you." Harry cried.

 

Gemma slowly set the white roses down whispering an I love you before she walked away holding her stomach and wiping away the tears while Harry looked after her. He noticed Louis sitting on a bench minding his own business and walked towards him as his sad expression turned into a smile. Louis looked up with a smile which quickly turned into a frown when he noticed Harry's expression.

 

"You okay Haz?" Louis patted the spot next to him.

 

"I am...just some things were said between my sister and I even though she didn't know I was there but everything's okay now. Wanna go home?" Harry asked.

 

"I'm glad. Yeah let's go." Louis smiled getting up.

 

The days passed by quickly much to Louis' dislike because it meant having to go back to school and he just wasn't ready for that kind of torture. Harry had promised him to always be there for him no matter what and that made him feel a bit better. Christmas had been perfect for them as well as new year's eve since they got to spend it together. It was already the middle of January and Louis couldn't help but whine at the fact that he was going to go back to school the next day and as usual when certain dreaded day arrived Spencer and Eric were already waiting for him by his locker. They had a smirk on their faces that Harry just wish he could wipe it off of their faces.

 

As soon as Louis got to his locker trying to ignore him he was immediately ceased by Eric who grabbed both of his arms as Spencer helped him drag him to the nearest bathroom and as soon as he had been set free he tried to make a run for it but they quickly blocked his way as Harry screamed at them to let him go. Spencer grabbed Louis by the neck and pushed him inside one of the toilet stalls making him drop to his knees-an action that set Harry off. Out of nowhere Spencer with the help of Eric pushed Louis' head down on the toilet completely soaking him then pulled him back up before he did it again then again as Harry desperately tried to stop them.

 

"JUST STOP IT, YOU'RE HURTING HIM! STOP!!" Harry screamed as loud as he could then heard the water pipes make a noise before they burst out making the cold water splash everywhere hitting all three boys.

 

Everything happened fast, one minute it was only the four of them then the next there were people everywhere wanting to know what had happened. Louis, Eric, and Spencer had immediately being taken to an ambulance waiting outside the school to make sure they were alright while Harry never left Louis' side whispering comforting words in his ear. Louis could see the weird looks Eric and Spencer were given him and felt very uncomfortable under their judging gazes. As soon as it was declared that all three of them were okay Harry let out a breath he didn't know he was holding even though he didn't give a flying fuck about Louis' bullies, he was walking next to a very quiet Louis when they caught up to them.

 

"You're gonna pay for that you freak." Spencer growled pushing Louis down then walked away followed by Eric.

 

"Lou you okay?" Harry asked.

 

"I'm just perfect." Louis snapped getting up and started the walk back home shivering even though he had on dry clothes from the lost and found.

 

"What's wrong, why are you mad at me?" Harry voice cracked following Louis upstairs.

 

"Why the hell would you do that? They think I'm a freak and they're just gonna get worse." Louis yelled taking a seat on the bed.

 

"Lou...love they were hurting you." Harry whispered.

 

"I'm not your Lou or your love. Why can't you just go away and leave me alone!" Louis yelled not really thinking first before speaking.

 

"Louis..." Harry whimpered feeling pain shoot all over his chest making it feel tight, it scared him to not feel as close to Louis as he had felt since that night they shared together.

 

"Who was I kidding Harry, we could never be together because you're just a ghost, you're dead and I'm alive. Just leave me alone and never talk to me ever again, you're dead you're just a ghost who can't seem to leave." Louis mumbled not daring to look up.

 

The more Louis talked the more far away Harry felt from him and he cried as he desperately tried to find a way to stay with him and never let go. He was just a ghost, that was true but he loved Louis with all he had and he had never felt like that for someone even when he had been alive. He reached to try and touch Louis and cried when his hand went right through his body and he could no longer sense him much less touch him.

 

"Just leave Harry." Louis growled trying to keep himself from crying.

 

"Lou please...Louis?" Louis heard Harry say before he disappeared.

 

He turned around finding the room empty and the white roses that somehow had managed to stay fresh and beautiful withered instantly leaving them an ugly brown color. No longer having anyone to see him cry he burst out crying missing Harry already, he had been mad and desperate when he told him he wanted him gone thinking he would stay but he had been wrong. He just wanted his bullies to leave him alone and after what Harry did he knew they were only going to get worse, he also knew that he would never be able to have Harry but having him around was better than not having him at all. He had made a mistake and now he just hoped for Harry to comeback so he could beg for forgiveness.

 

January 30, 2014

 

The days passed and Harry never came back effectively killing Louis on the inside as the days went by, he refused to do anything and he had resumed to cutting-something he had stopped doing after meeting Harry. Eric and Spencer only got worse taking to beating him everyday and what hurt the most was that Harry wasn't there to comfort him, Jay had noticed the sudden change in Louis and how she could no longer hear him talk to Harry and instead she could hear the muffled cries that came from his room. She tried to help him by suggesting for him to go spend a few days with Niall, Liam, and Zayn who were always calling to check on him but he refused thinking that if he left then Harry could comeback and he wouldn't be there when he did so.

 

February 1, 2014

 

"Harry? Harry please comeback I need you, I'm sorry about every thing I said I didn't mean it." Louis walked around the house crying and calling for Harry, he was alone and he just couldn't do it anymore.

 

"Harry..." Louis pleaded not bothering to wipe away the tears.

 

He walked upstairs to his mum's room opening her safety box taking out the one item that would finally put an end to every thing, to all of his suffering. He quickly walked back to his room writing a note for his mum and sat down on the spot where Harry had been murdered eighteen years ago. He took the gun and put the gun barrel inside of his mouth aiming it at the back of his throat, his hands trembled violently as the tears fell down his cheeks as he counted down from ten begging his mum for forgiveness and telling Harry how much he still loved him. He closed his eyes tightly shut and pulled the trigger and soon he could no longer feel anything as everything went black.

 

"Louis no!" Harry screamed appearing back in the room just as the gun shot echoed around the house. He watched in horror as his body fell forward and the blood started flowing out of the back of his head.

 

"Louis no...Lou please wake up love. Louis please don't do this to me, Lou..." Harry pleaded as he hovered over him wanting to touch him but unable to.

 

"Harry." Harry felt a small warm hand wrap around his shoulder and immediately turned around crying harder.

 

"Why?" Was all Harry could ask.

 

"I just couldn't live anymore, I was already dead on the inside and it was bound to happen at any moment now. I'm sorry for all the things I said to you, I didn't mean any of them." Louis knelt down next to Harry.

 

"Your mum...she'll be here at any minute now. I don't want to be here when she finds you." Harry got up ready to leave when they heard the front door opening.

 

They couldn't go and instead watched as Jay called for Louis then her heartbreaking screams when she found him laying in his own pool of blood. She ignored the blood and cradled him against her chest rocking him back and forth as she read the note and sobbed screaming why. They watched as his body was being pulled out of his room covered in a white sheet as his mother and his three friends who Jay had called before she called the ambulance and had managed to get there as fast as they could cried inconsolably as they observed his body until he was no longer in sight.

 

A few days later Harry and Louis stood in the graveyard as he was being buried and deciding it was time to go they took each other's hand and walked away crossing over as Harry had finally managed to see the light. They crossed the gates smiling at each other and stealing kisses happy to finally be able to touch and feel each other. They had been made for each other, they belonged together like the soul mates they were.

 

In Loving Memory Of

My Little Angel

Louis William Tomlinson

12/24/1995 - 2/1/2014

If I should go tomorrow  
It would never be goodbye,  
For I have left my heart with you,  
So don't you ever cry.

 

In Loving Memory Of

Harry Edward Styles

2/1/1977 - 12/24/1995

Loving son and brother.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane,  
I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

 

Those were the words Louis and Harry's families would always read whenever they would visit their graves since due to destiny they had been buried next to each other, with time Harry's family had accepted that it was a coincidence the young Louis Tomlinson had been born and had died the same days as Harry but never Jay. Jay had known about his son's friend Harry Styles, after Louis' death she had found out a young boy by the name Harry had been murdered in Louis' old room when she was selling the house. Whenever she visited them she would always look up at the sky with a tiny smile knowing they were happy, she couldn't be any more right.

 

Fin.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and Kudos are greatly appreciated. :)


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